Flying Solo

Most of my friends and family know that Justin went to Indonesia on a mission/retreat/vacation trip with his good friend Andy. We have gone 17 days so far without him and have 8 more to endure. This is the first time he has traveled over seas and the first time we have been apart for more than 10 days at a time, while having three kids. It's been somewhat of a roller coaster of emotions for me. Being 7 1/2 months pregnant I think I am feeling a little more sorry for myself than I normally would. The first week went by pretty quickly because the girls and I went on a road trip to the Bay area with Justin's parents but this last week has felt like 2 to me. It has gone by so slow. I feel as though I am stalking my computer because the entire time he has been gone our only means of communication has been randomly catching each other on facebook and then more recently been able to skype after randomly catching each other on facebook. The days that go by where there is no contact at all are the longest and most unproductive for me. If I at least know he is okay then I can leave my computer alone and get stuff done. All of the communication is basically in his hands because I have no way of contacting him at all if I needed to or wanted to and that has been really difficult. I am usually pretty tired by the time the girls go to bed and have been turning in early most nights unless I am sitting up waiting on facebook for the chance that he appear (sounds so dramatic I know). The kids have done much better than I thought they would and in some ways so have I but in others I have done much worse. I didn't expect the lack of communication and not knowing where, what, and how he is doing would be so hard on me. I guess I am so used to texting him any time of day and getting a response within minutes. I just hope the next 8 days go by quicker than this week. Getting out of the house and keeping busy seems to help. God has been good in so many ways during the separation that I can't help but be thankful and acknowledge his works. I already mentioned how much better the kids are handling it than I thought but special mention must go out to Addy who is in the process of potty training. Despite the absence of someone very important to her she has just gone along with everything with ease (as much as a two year old can) and has done so well with potty training. I am really pleasantly surprised based on experiences with other children who shall remain nameless when daddy was gone for an extended period of time. Also, knock on wood, so far no major injuries or trips to the hospital like times in past when dad was gone. I don't deal well with the ouchies so it's best they don't occur on my watch. A lot of times, well most, when my hubby is away for a night I do not sleep well, I toss and turn, hear every little sound, and actually lay awake fearful of something happening to him or us. My imagination can really get the best of me. So far God has been so good to me and I have not had any issues with that at all. I am sure some of it has to do with me being prego and super tired every night my head hits the pillow but I still feel like God has protected me from my own fears. If you remember, keep us all in your prayers over the next week. It sounds like God is doing some amazing things in and through my husband and Andy and I can't wait to hear about everything and see the works of His hands when they return. If you have already been praying for us I thank you, your prayers are so important to us.